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-
- Elvis Detector Version 1.0
- (C) Copyright 1992 TOGGLE BOOLEANS
- All rights reserved.
-
- The TOGGLE BOOLEANS Elvis detector is designed to sense the
- presence of Elvis or his spirit in your vicinity. It includes
- some of the most reliable Elvis detection methods gathered from
- supermarket tabloids over the last several years.
- If you are running Windows 3.1 then it is best to put the
- Elvis Detector in your StartUp program manager group. This way
- the Elvis Detector will run as soon as you start Windows,
- thereby maximizing your chances of detecting Elvis.
-
- If the Elvis detector goes off, perform the following steps
- in order:
-
- 1 - Look behind you and under your desk. Elvis almost
- always catches people by surprise.
- 2 - If no one around you looks like Elvis, look a little
- closer. Many tabloids have reported that Elvis has
- the ability to disguise himself at will.
- 3 - If you still have not found any concrete signs of
- Elvis in the people near you, then look outside and
- down the street in both directions.
- If there is a discernable trail of fainted middle-
- aged women then quickly follow it as far as you can.
- If the trail becomes difficult to follow then look
- around for the glint of sequins.
- 4 - If after trying all of the above, you still can't find
- Elvis then there's not much more you can do. Elvis
- works in mysterious ways. Perhaps the Detector sensed
- the spirit of Elvis passing by on his way to visit
- one of his most loyal fans.
-
- If you find the Elvis Detector to be useful product, you may be
- interested in purchasing the Elvis Detector Version 2.0.
- Version 2.0 contains a more sophisticated Elvis Detection algorithm
- and has been expanded to also detect the spirits of Roy Orbision,
- Rocket Robin Hood, and M.C. Hammer.
-
- Custom detectors are also available. When ordering custom
- detectors please include at least three phrases that the object
- of the detector tends to say to enable the detector to make positive
- identification.
-
- To order the Elvis Detector Version 2.0 please send a cheque
- or money order for $8.00 (Canadian funds) to the address below.
- If you live outside of Canada please send a cheque or international
- money order for or $7.00 U.S.
-
- TOGGLE BOOLEANS
- P.O. Box 4204
- Station E
- Ottawa, Ontario
- Canada, K1S 5B2
-
- Make all cheques payable to TOGGLE BOOLEANS.
- Custom Detectors are $5.00 Canadian ($4.50 U.S) each.
-
- Disclaimer #1
- -------------
- Due to the transient nature of Elvis and his spirit,
- TOGGLE BOOLEANS cannot guarantee, in any way, that the Elvis
- Detector will ever detect Elvis in your vicinity.
- TOGGLE BOOLEANS will in no way be liable, in financial,
- emotional or other terms, if Elvis or his spirit appears in
- your vicinity and the Elvis Detector fails to detect him.
-
-
- License and Disclaimer #2
- -------------------------
- The files that comprise the TOGGLE BOOLEANS Elvis Detector
- (ELVIS.EXE, ELVIS.TXT) may be freely copied provided that all
- of the files are copied as a group, such as in a single archive,
- and the files are not modified in any way including removal
- or alteration of copyright notices or this license.
-
- The TOGGLE BOOLEANS Elvis Detector is provided AS IS.
- TOGGLE BOOLEANS will in no way be responsible, in financial or any other
- terms, for damages (both consequential and incidental) resulting from
- the use or misuse of the Elvis Detector.
-